Sweetly Broken; an oxymoron?

“Sweetly Broken, Wholly Surrendered.”

Ah, the lyrics of that song are perfect.

Since accepting Christ as my savior, I think one of the biggest changes I have noticed in myself is my ability to deal with pain and/or disappointment. I must admit that I have had quite the temper ever since I was a little girl, however, now instead of getting immediately angry, I am able to see how God can mold us from our experiences—enjoyable or not.

That makes me think of another point though. So often we say that things “just aren’t going right” or they’re “too rough” or “God just won’t give me a break," but is that really the case?

In church on Sunday, our pastor, Rick, said something like:

People always want to know "why?", and they want to know now. They search for what God is trying to show them, and they may find every reason, except for the true heart of their issue at hand. Well, there are some things that God just will not show you because He doesn’t have to. God has your best interest at heart, and He will show you in His time, but there is a reason He won’t give you the answer RIGHT NOW.

I connected with that SO WELL because I am one of those people! I talked to a good friend about a problem that I want an answer to RIGHT NOW, and I swear that God spoke right through her and comforted me by telling me what I needed to hear. It’s like I got so wrapped up in my own issue that I couldn’t even see another perspective until I had that conversation, and everything she said totally put my racing heart to rest.

After talking with her more I came to realize this about myself: I have to STOP thinking that I am right all the time! Like Pastor Rick said God doesn’t have to show me the answer to everything right now, so instead of me coming up with “solution” after “solution” to my problem, maybe I should just trust that God has it all taken care of; trust Him the way I want to and the way I am meant to. The whole experience was a big “slap in the face” type realization when I realized that I wasn’t trusting God as much as I thought I was.

Anyway through it all I realized that I have been broken by painful experiences in my past, I am still dealing with the brokenness today, and I will be broken countless times in the future. However, now I can say that I realize how beautiful the brokenness is because 1.) I trust God’s plan for me, and 2.) I know I can always grow from the mistakes I make, people I meet, and the experiences that God places in my life.

I am wholly surrendered to God’s will for my life.

Ah, beautiful.

Peace, L-O-V-E, trust and joy,

Kayla <3 Love